I finally have the time to blog...from work.
Sigh...the pressure is starting to hit me now. Pressure starting from work, to baby and looking for the perfect daycare/babysitter for Suraya.
From trying to finish my chores in the morning to coming home and finishing even more chores. The past few nights, we have been visiting daycares after work, sometimes spending up to 45 minutes at each daycare just to interview the care provider, lots of things to look at, inspect and consider in every aspect. Getting the hunch that the particular daycare is the right one for Suraya can be tiring. BUT finally, we have found a daycare that is up the hill, only a block away from home.
At the same time, pressure at home can be domineering. Having mak taking care of Suraya is such a blessing. But you know, most times, I have to make sure that my mom is very well taken care of and I have to control what I feel most times. Don't take me wrong, mak has been wonderful. Its just that, I have to tone down with my bad attitudes.
I think since I gave birth, I do not have time to relax, emotionally...in the sense of not having to visit or see anyone and let me hang loose, with my bad attitudes and laziness, you know what I mean?
Sigh...the pressure is starting to hit me now. Pressure starting from work, to baby and looking for the perfect daycare/babysitter for Suraya.
From trying to finish my chores in the morning to coming home and finishing even more chores. The past few nights, we have been visiting daycares after work, sometimes spending up to 45 minutes at each daycare just to interview the care provider, lots of things to look at, inspect and consider in every aspect. Getting the hunch that the particular daycare is the right one for Suraya can be tiring. BUT finally, we have found a daycare that is up the hill, only a block away from home.
At the same time, pressure at home can be domineering. Having mak taking care of Suraya is such a blessing. But you know, most times, I have to make sure that my mom is very well taken care of and I have to control what I feel most times. Don't take me wrong, mak has been wonderful. Its just that, I have to tone down with my bad attitudes.
I think since I gave birth, I do not have time to relax, emotionally...in the sense of not having to visit or see anyone and let me hang loose, with my bad attitudes and laziness, you know what I mean?
I am not regretting of having my beautiful baby. I am loving each and every moment being a new mother again and also having a companion relationship with Mas, but sometimes, I wish I am given the chance to not have to put up a face (like putting a prop on my face) in meeting someone or visiting anyone for a long period of time...it is really tiring. Its like making everybody happy except myself.
But I shall recover. I'll get my positive zen back...I hope.
6 comments:
I don't believe it! I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!! Am I really the first one here?
Anyway, welcome to motherhood. ALL-OVER-AGAIN. Funny though, I felt the exact same thing just this afternoon. Coming home from work to a sink full of dishes, but still had to rush and get some groceries, and make dinner while holding a meeting with one of the gals.
I was doing the shopping when suddenly I was hit with a surge of pure exhaustion, thinking I would just drop dead at that moment. Called my soul mate and got a pep-talk. Went home and made dinner-in 10 minutes. Even the gal who I had a meeting with was surprised. She was just taking notes, and when she looked up, dinner was served!
ailin, thank you my dear. when i read ur blog, sometimes i wish that i was ur neighbor cos u always have food for visitors and i dont think i could be as hospitable as u.
but at times, we do tend to feel a lil bit 'run down' kan?
now, when i get home, i put down my purse and start cooking. no time to waste cos i get hungry myself!
ely, you'll get used to the roputine soon and later not even feel the pressure of it. hang in there girl!
oh it's so hot down here u feel so run down anyway even if u haven't moved your butt from last night, u know what i mean.
am a serious slob i am...
miss u.
you'll get jived up soon enough my dear. soon enough.
Time will fly very fast.. you'll get over it without noticing. Hang in there!
thank you everyone for your kind encouragement. i know that i will get the hang of it soon.
seems like the reason why i am feeling crappy is cos i a HAVING A COLD NOW!!!
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